On this episode: Elizabeth Newcamp, Zak Rosen, and Jamilah Lemieux talk about cutting through the noise. A member of the Slate Parenting Facebook group recently posted asking about earplugs — but there are lots of strategies for tuning out, and dealing with, the noise and energy of kids in your house.

We’ll also share a round of recommendations — and then, if you’re in the Slate Plus club, we discuss a program in Philadelphia that pays parents to handle school dropoff and pickup… and what other tasks we wish we were getting paid for.

Recommendations:

Jamilah recommends: The End Of Love, and keeping a book of your kid’s quips
Zak recommends: Father of the Bride
Elizabeth recommends: Rainbow Making Window Clings 

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
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Kids Are Loud. Will Earplugs Help Me Cope?

On this episode: Jamilah sits down with Andie and Sabrina of Pop Culture Moms, ABC’s newest podcast. The three talk through the origins of the show (and Andie and Sabrina’s friendship), and the onscreen moms who shaped our understanding of motherhood. 

We’ll also debrief on our week in parenting with a round of triumphs and fails… including some stories about learning to shower, a shower of [redacted bodily fluid], and choosing clothes for a preteen. 

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
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The Pop Culture Moms Who Changed Us

On this episode: Elizabeth Newcamp, Zak Rosen, and Lucy Lopez answer a question from the Slate Parenting Facebook group… wondering what counts as a good grade, and what the consequences should be at home for bad grades. We come in hot with a dismissal of the whole premise. It’s great. 

We’ll also share a round of recommendations — and then, if you’re in the Slate Plus club, we’re assembling our own toddler book tolerability index.

Recommendations: 
Elizabeth recommends:  This episode of Radio Lab: Zoozve
Lucy recommends: What The Bread Says by Vanessa Garcia
Zak recommends: A Light in the Attic read by Shel Silverstein

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
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You Know What? Grades Are Bullsh*t.

On this episode: Elizabeth, Zak and Lucy dive into the voicemails you left us about last week’s special After Dark episodes. We’re so glad that these got you talking — so we’re closing the loop on Elizabeth and Jeff’s morning routine, and how to deal with mismatched sex drives.

We’ll also debrief on our week in parenting with a round of triumphs and fails… including some stories about the Amazon app, desk doodles, and owning your sexuality.

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Checking Our Voicemails (Romance Edition)

We’re off today for President’s Day, but we didn’t want to leave you empty-handed. So! We’re sharing a great episode from our friends at Decoder Ring — where they’ll answer great questions about everything from the baby on board sign to why we all played the recorder in school.
If you like what you hear, be sure to follow Decoder Ring wherever you listen for new episodes every two weeks.
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Decoder Ring: Why Did We All Play The Recorder?

On our second C&F After Dark episode: we know that Valentine’s has come and gone. But we’re not done talking about grownup stuff! 

Elizabeth, Zak and Lucy each sit down with their spouses — Jeff, Shira and Geno — to talk through a problem they’ve had as a co-parenting couple. The hosts chime in on each others’ problems, too. It’s an advice extravaganza… and, dare we say, a love-fest?

Then, we’ll wrap up by testing how in-sync our hosts are with their spouses. It’s time for a round of the Newlywed Game! 

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

C&F After Dark: Couples’ Therapy

On this episode: Elizabeth Newcamp, Zak Rosen, and Jamilah Lemieux talk about the birds and the bees. 

Parents don’t often get to talk about their sex lives out in the open… So this Valentine’s week, we thought we’d open the door to all things romance. 

First up: we answer a listener question about managing different sex drives and all the normal parenting stuff. Then you’ll hear from resident single mom Jamilah about the logistics of swiping and dating with a kid in the house.

We’ll also share a round of recommendations — and then, if you’re in the Slate Plus club, we’ll basically have a “hating Valentine’s Day” support circle. 

Recommendations: 
Elizabeth recommends: Super Simple Biology
Jamilah recommends: Grilling your PB&J
Zak recommends: Recording your kids' laughter and dating it.

Care & Feeding is sponsored by Betterhelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/CAREANDFEEDING today to get 10% off your first month. 

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

C&F After Dark: Sex and Parenting

On this episode: Elizabeth, Zak and Jamilah advise the parent of a handsy kindergartener. The little girl comes from a cuddly family and just doesn’t have a sense of personal space… and it’s impacting her school experience as a result. How can a parent help teach the value of a bubble?

Zak found two books that might be helpful: Personal Space Camp and Personal Space Invader.

We’ll also debrief on our week in parenting with a round of triumphs and fails, and then offer some important perspective on how long kids have been killing time with screens.

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

My Kid Has Zero Personal Bubble

On this episode: Elizabeth Newcamp, Zak Rosen, and Jamilah Lemieux help a member of our Facebook group brainstorm ways to keep a 4th grader occupied… that don’t revolve around screentime. With busy schedules and parents working from home, it’s hard to be hands-on. But we have some ideas.

We’ll also share a round of recommendations — and then, if you’re in the Slate Plus club, we’ll dispense some highly subjective wisdom about the best times to do… well, everything. 

Recommendations: 
Elizabeth recommends: ordering a specialty meal on airplanes
Zak recommends: the Hairstreaq brush 
Jamilah recommends: Ugly Betty


Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

My 4th Grader Needs Help Boredom Busting

On this episode: Elizabeth, Zak and Jamilah help a member of our Facebook group who’s worried that her son isn’t making friends… because the kids at school separate into gender cliques, and he’s not into roughhousing “boy stuff.” We’ll discuss how to help this kid feel more comfortable joining games — and whether the teacher needs to be looped in.

We’ll also debrief on our week in parenting with a round of triumphs and fails, and then revisit a conversation we had about a toddler with separation anxiety. 

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

My Son Doesn’t “Play Like A Boy”

On this episode Elizabeth Newcamp, Zak Rosen, and Lucy Lopez help a listener whose toddler has suddenly developed what looks a lot like panic attacks at preschool. Nothing seems wrong at school… but the girl’s dad has been deployed for a while. What’s happening here, and how can you soothe someone so little about such big stuff?

Elizabeth wants to share these resources: 

Military One Source

Sesame Street for Military Families 

Maggie the Military Rat 

The Invisible String 



We’ll also share a round of recommendations — and then, if you’re in the Slate Plus club, we’ll play a round of parenting Would You Rather. 

Recommendations: 
Zak recommends: Life On Our Planet
Elizabeth recommends: Timeline Twist Cardgame 
Lucy recommends: Orion and the Dark (out Feb 2 in the U.S.!)


Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is My Toddler Having Panic Attacks?

On this episode: Elizabeth, Zak and Lucy help a listener who’s pretty sure they smelled marijuana when their young teen and a friend got in the car. The parent is wondering if they should have said something… but if so, what? And when is really too young?

We’ll also go over our week in parenting triumphs and fails — including an update on Henry’s solo trip in Tokyo — and share some listener mail we got about teenage tattoos.

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Maura Currie, with special thanks to Rosemary Belson.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I Think I Smelled Weed On My 13-Year-Old

On this episode Elizabeth Newcamp, Zak Rosen, and Lucy Lopez weigh in on a classic question: what school is right for your family? Our letter writers’ kid is gifted and their family has fallen in love with a local private school — but they’re also grappling with some guilt. How important is it to give your kid the best, if it also means putting them in a privilege bubble? 

They also share some products and activities they’re loving right now. Then, if you have Slate Plus, is yelling actually useful? 

Recommendations: 
Zak: De-icing your car in the winter with a warm bag of water. 
Lucy: Quarterly family vision boards!
Elizabeth: Sushi Monster App 

Reading: 
The Truth About Yelling by Emily Edlynn 
How (and why) to stop yelling at your kids by Shannon Shelton Miller

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.
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Private School Guilt

On this episode: Zak Rosen and Elizabeth Newcamp welcome Lucy Lopez to the team as our fourth regular host. 

The three of them tackle a letter from a listener who’s dreading the return to work after a year off with their newborn. We’ll offer some advice for how to soften the emotional blow and smooth out the logistical snarls — and, how to find new moments to cherish.

We’ll also dive into our week in triumphs and fails, as usual — and then, we’ll share a quick piece of listener mail. Which we’re going to start doing every episode… so why don’t you drop us a line? 

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mourning Parental Leave Before It’s Even Over

From our friends at Slate's Hear Me Out:… new year, new you?
If you’ve resolved to make 2024 your happiest, healthiest, most organized, most peaceful, etc. year yet? You’re not alone. And if you’re pretty sure the people who have made resolutions are doomed to abandon ship before January is over … you’re not alone, either. Nor are you wrong, exactly.
In the season of giving, getting, and evaluating self-improvement advice, there’s a line between over-optimism and self-limiting skepticism. And our guest wants to help you walk that line.
Zak Rosen, host of The Best Advice Show and co-host of Slate’s Care & Feeding, joins us.
If you have thoughts you want to share, or an idea for a topic we should tackle, you can email the show: hearmeout@slate.com
Podcast production by Maura Currie.
You can skip all the ads in Hear Me Out by joining Slate Plus. Sign up now at slate.com/hearmeoutplus for just $15 a month for your first three months.
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Hear Me Out: Yes, You Can Self-Improve Right Now

On this episode: Zak Rosen, Elizabeth Newcamp, and Jamilah Lemieux help a listener who’s thrilled that she and her siblings all had kids in 2022 — but, as those babies become toddlers, the temptation to compare the cousins is strong. How can this no-drama mama prevent herself and her siblings from falling into this trap… not to mention grandparents and partners?
We’ll also dive into our week in triumphs and fails, as usual. We’re off this coming Monday for MLK Day, but we’ll see you back in the main feed Thursday.
Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.

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Avoiding The Toxic Comparison Spiral

On this episode: Zak Rosen, Elizabeth Newcamp, and Jamilah Lemieux help a listener who is fed up. Her husband works a lot and when he is around he’s only ‘fun dad.’ Upon experiencing burnout, the letter writer asked her husband to pitch in more—to which he suggested ‘hire a nanny.’ Elizabeth, Jamilah, and Zak have suggestions for rebalancing the relationship. They also share recommendations and then, on Slate Plus, they discuss the parenting resolutions they are not going to keep this year. 

Recommendations: 
Zak: Wonka
Jamilah: Wonka and The Color Purple
Elizabeth: TypeLit.io

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.
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I Refuse to Replace My Husband With a Nanny

On this episode: Zak Rosen, Elizabeth Newcamp, and Jamilah Lemieux ring in the new year with a name change. We’re now Care & Feeding! 

For our first advice of 2024, the hosts help a listener who funds their 18-year-old’s life — but the prospect of a tattoo has the listener second-guessing. Should they try to stop their kid from doing something they might regret (with their parents’ money)... or has that train already left the station?

We’ll also dive into our holiday triumphs and fails. For our Slate Plus listeners: the exclusive Slate Plus segment is moving to Monday shows, so hang in there for a few days and then we’ll be back to our weekly schedule.

Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus to help support our work.

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.
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Can I Stop My Adult Kid From Getting a Tattoo?

From our friends at Slate's How To! podcast: Allison is on the hunt for her next hobby. One that’s satisfying. One that she can stick with. One that will fit into her family’s very busy schedule. Except…maybe she’s thinking about that last part all wrong. On this episode, Courtney Martin brings on Eve Rodsky, author of Fair Play and Find Your Unicorn Space. Eve argues that drawing—and defending—boundaries for individual, creative pursuits is necessary for living a fulfilled life. She’ll share how to balance domestic labor in order to carve out creative space and pick something that makes your soul sing. 

If you liked this episode, check out: How To Stop “Having It All” (Before You End Up With Nothing)

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To’s executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson and Kevin Bendis. 

Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus.
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How Parents Can Carve Out Creative Time

On this episode: Our favorite Plus segments of 2023. Jamilah, Elizabeth, and Zak step back in time to talk tips for winter break, the photos our kids take of us, respecting those kids’ privacy when we talk about them on air, the social media accounts we’re loving, and the parenting trends we wish would disappear.

Remember: we’re changing names in 2024! We’re so excited to become Care & Feeding and bring you more great advice from around the Slate Parenting universe. If you’re subscribed, you should stay that way, even when we change names; but if you lose track of us in the new year, just search for Care & Feeding wherever you listen.

If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Mom and Dad are Fighting. Sign up now at slate.com/momanddadplus to help support our work.

Join us on Facebook and email us at momanddad@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. 

Podcast produced by Rosemary Belson and Maura Currie.
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