Today's episode is all about how to improve communication with your significant other. One of the unfortunate effects of this pandemic is that too many people who were already feeling disconnected are now feeling even more isolated and disconnected than they did before. In this episode, I share an outline to help you clean up your communication with your significant other and talk about practical ways to make use of the skills that promote love and connection. I also discuss ways that you can make sure the communication in your relationship is healthy, functional, and productive -- and if it's not, you will know what to do to improve it after you listen to this episode. Listen in to find out what shapes communication, how to break bad communication habits, and ways to respond sensitively to your partner. "We need to understand the skills that promote love and connection." - John Howard, MA. If you'd like to check out our awesome online programs for couples, come visit us at www.johnhowardmft.com. And to support the show, please leave us a rating and review on iTunes/Apple Podcasts. Thank You!

63 Improve Communication with Your Partner

I am celebrating today and I hope you will celebrate with me. This is a special show to me because yesterday my first book launched. More Than Words: The Science of Deepening Love and Connection in Any Relationship was released just in time for these few weeks leading up to Valentine's Day and I'm excited to talk about the book today and to give you a preview of what you are going to learn. I used my ten years of working with couples and the latest neuroscience and poured all of those secrets into the book. In this episode, I share highlights from the book and the keys to implementing these tips. I also talk about why we often feel disconnected in our relationships and how to be more present with a partner. Help me with my mission to spread love all around the world and listen in to this episode as I share the experience of writing my first book and discuss the joys and the challenges of shared living, ways to connect more deeply with a partner, and how to know if it's time to end a relationship. "Every single day is a learning experience in a relationship." - John Howard MA. If you'd like to check out our awesome online programs for couples, come visit us at www.johnhowardmft.com. And to support the show, please leave us a rating and review on iTunes/Apple Podcasts. Thank You!

62 New Book! More Than Words

A bad night of sleep has the power to wear down your defenses and leave you physically and emotionally drained during the day. That’s why, in this episode, you’ll learn from my colleague Dr. Katie Strickland about the Biopsychosocial model, how to maintain a healthy sleep pattern, and how sleep affects your relationships. You’ll learn how the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy style of therapy can treat sleep issues, how physical exercise aids mental health, and how to treat insomnia without medication. "We're really trying to improve overall mood and manage stress by learning how to become more attuned to our emotional experiences." - Katie Strickland If you'd like to check out our awesome online programs for couples, come visit us at www.johnhowardmft.com. And to support the show, please leave us a rating and review on iTunes/Apple Podcasts. Thank You!

61 Improve your Sleep with Katie Strickland

Welcome back to the show! In Season Two we want to capitalize on everything that we are learning at our new, broader wellness center, where we are working at the intersection of health, wellness and relationship life. We are going to be having broader conversations about your health and wellness, how to optimize your relationship health, mental health, and physical health, and how to deal with the coronavirus pandemic in terms of our existential life. Where are we drawing our sense of purpose from? Do we have a sense of tribe and belonging? I hope you enjoy this new season of The John Howard Show. If you'd like to check out our awesome online programs for couples, come visit us at www.johnhowardmft.com. To support the show, please leave us a rating and review on iTunes/Apple Podcasts. Thank You!

Season 2 Trailer

We reveal the big project we've been working on for the past 6 months. Tune in to learn powerful new tips that relate to our expanded mission! “We want you to feel more present in your mind, in your body, and with the people that matter the most to you.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-60

60 The Big Reveal

“There are no simple solutions to our differences. You have to embrace that complexity.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-59

59 The Essential Skill You Need In Relationships

Find out how therapy works and the ingredients you'll need to make it successful. Learn why therapy is both a science and an art. “Therapy generally is more productive and more successful if the therapist is available for a real relationship with you.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-58

58 How Therapy Works with John Howard

Learn how to manage and be around your extended family members while maintaining a healthy connection with your partner. Visit relatives with ease! “One way to protect yourselves and also make it more fun, is to go into extended family situations with a game plan of prioritizing yourselves, prioritizing your connection, prioritizing spending quality time with each other.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-57

57 How to Be Around Extended Family

Tune in to learn what narcissism is, how to identify narcissistic traits & behaviors, and how to handle a narcisstic partner. “The typical narcissist presents like a jerk and therefore doesn’t elicit much empathy from others. But to a trained mental health professional, narcissism looks like untreated trauma– like a call for help.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-56

56 Narcissism: What is it and How to Deal with It

Tune in to learn how to be vulnerable with your partner in a way that won’t make you seem weak, overly needy, or pathetic to your partner. “We dismiss emotion too quickly, therefore we don’t take the time to savor the wisdom that’s embedded in feelings.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-55

55 Being Vulnerable without Being Pathetic

John Howard talks about the ten most common mental health issues that impact relationships, the unique challenges of each, and how to overcome them. “Sometimes, there’s a legitimate reason why you don’t feel safe and secure in a relationship, but very often we don’t feel secure because of our baseline anxiety. And so, when you start to treat it, there are really wonderful things that can happen in a relationship.” – John Howard. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-54

54 Mental & Emotional Health in Relationships

Tune in to learn how to fully access the potential for individual and relationship growth that exists in every relationship while maintaining boundaries. “That’s the beauty and wisdom of relationships: we bring people into our lives and they have a different world view and they have different perspectives and habits. If we just treat all those differences as annoying artifacts that we have to deal with, then we’re not fully open to who we can become through relationship.” – John Howard Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-53

53 Becoming vs Boundaries

John Howard talks to Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott, hosts of the Therapist Uncensored podcast. Tune in for an inside perspective on the hosts and their show. “When we feel threat or fear or feel like we’re being attacked, we actually tribalize and polarize. What’s interesting in our culture right now is I think that’s being used against us.” – Ann Kelley. Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-52.

52 Uncensoring Therapist Uncensored

Renée Trudeau and John Howard talk about how you can challenge your partner to grow without sending a message of judgment or non-acceptance. “What would it look like to cultivate an unwavering allegiance to yourself?” – Renée Trudeau Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-51

51 Acceptance & Growth with Renée Trudeau

John Howard and Lora Ferguson discuss a compassionate approach to parenting, Positive Discipline. Learn how to raise responsible kids with kindness! “It’s healthy to discuss emotions in the family structure. It’s healthy for the parents to share their own struggles. It gives kids a language and an opportunity to share their own emotions and allows them to see that adults are comfortable with their imperfection.” – John Howard Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-50

50 Positive Discipline

Dr. Pittman McGehee and John Howard discuss why self compassion is essential to mental and relationship health and how you can begin practicing it. “We think that we’re connected in our perfection, but really we’re connected in our imperfection. One of the common things about being human is that we all suffer; it’s part of what it is to be human. So rather than feeling isolated in that, with self compassion we can feel connected in that.”– Pittman McGehee Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-49

49 Self-Compassion with Pittman McGehee

Juliane Taylor-Shore and John Howard discuss how understanding your brain can lead to relationships that feel more safe, intimate and loving. “I’m not interested in helping people stop flipping their lids. I’m interested in helping them react to the moment they do (flip their lid) differently.” – Juliane Taylor-Shore Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-48

48 The Neuroscience of We

Dr. Stan Tatkin and John Howard discuss the importance of practicing relationship skills as the most effective means of improving your closest relationship. “Most everything we do is automatic and reflexive and informed by our memory. So if we don’t practice things, then we’re just going to just do what we do automatically and we may get in trouble for that.” – Dr. Stan Tatkin Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-47

47 Practicing Relationship Skills

Couples therapists Terry Real and John Howard discuss how the patriarchal power structure we live in is the primary seed of conflict in many relationships. “Falling in love is believing that this person is going to heal you or complete you. Real marriage comes the day you realize that they are exquisitely designed to stick the burning spear right into your eyeball.” – Terry Real Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-46

46 Getting Real with Terry Real

Join Gottman senior faculty member Dr. Vagdevi Meunier and John Howard to discuss the Gottman Method approach to relationship health and counseling. “It turns out that positivity in the form of fondness, admiration, compliments, turning towards your partner, completely overrides or mitigates any of the conflict that you have in a relationship. Your focus needs to be on fun!” – Dr. Vagdevi Meunier Learn more about this episode of Ready Set Love at www.readysetlove.com/episode-45

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