I used to carry a heavy, constant sadness, feeling like everything was happening to me and believing I was a vicim of misfortune. I spent so much energy trying to manage things outside of my control, while doing very little with what was actually within it. It felt like clenching my fists around nothing, exhausting myself and fixing nothing.I had an epiphany in a conversation one day, that opened the door to a simpler way of living. I began to learn how to just be, staying present without forcing outcomes, observing without needing to fix, and breaking life down into small, manageable steps. Every day I practice letting go of the need to control things I can’t and finding a more peaceful way to move through life one small step at a time.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Just Be: The Peace I Was Missing

Have you ever wanted something so deeply, and you still had to let it go? “Crying for the moon, but the moon won’t have you” is painful, but it’s not a dead end. There have been an extraordinary number of times in my life when no matter how badly I wanted life to be different, I could not change what was. The death of my high school crush when I was 18, realizing I am an alcoholic, determining I have a permanent disability, and medical retirement are just several devastating seasons of my life.Longing can turn into resistance, and that resistance deepens suffering. There’s a difference between grieving and living in the past. Intentional grieving has helped me process loss without letting it take over my entire day, or my life for that matter, as it used to. It helps me shift my focus from what’s out of reach to what’s right in front of me. Healing happens when I stop reaching for the moon and start noticing what’s still possible today.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Crying for the Moon: But Choosing What’s Within Reach

At ten years of sobriety, I’m just getting started. I reflected today on how I don’t need to see the whole picture to keep walking forward. In fact, I’m grateful I can’t. It’s the uncertainties that teach me how to let go and trust the process. It’s so hard to see the value and meaning in the hard stuff while you’re living it, but perspective and beauty arrives later. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Celebrating a Sober Decade: As Happy As I Allow Myself

Many of us say without even thinking: “It’s okay.” But it’s actually not. In this episode, I share about complex emotions related to choosing your well-being while also feeling the weight of what you’re missing. Through a deeply personal experience, I walk through the coexistence of  gratitude and grief, and the habit many of us have of minimizing our feelings to protect others.I explore how naming our emotions bring order to the chaos between my ears, and why feelings like jealousy, resentment, and guilt are simply human. Today we’re learning to stop saying “it’s okay” when it isn’t, and instead find peace in honesty. The situation may not be okay, but my feelings and I are.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

It’s Not Okay: But I Am

I voted today!And on another completely unrelated note, self-pity counteracts faith. It’s easy in early sobriety, stroke recovery, and vestibular recovery, to get pulled into that trap of frustration, fatigue, and emotional pain feeling permanent. If I sit in self-pity, it can actually push me backward and reinforce hopelessness.In order to loosen my grip on the illusion of control, I must trust beyond what we can see, and take the next right step even when I don’t understand where it's leading me. Through small faithful actions, I'm stepping out of self and into connection. The willingness to keep showing up has carried me most of the way on my recovery journey. What feels like a dead end is often a repositioning and test of faith. There is still a path forward, even if it looks nothing like the one I planned.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Loosen Your Grip: Stepping Out Of Self

It’s easy in stroke and vestibular recovery to compare who we used to be with who we are today, and  that comparison can distort our thinking. Living in “before” erodes appreciation for “now,” despite the trials we are in. The present is where recovery happens, so we are better off to stay present. Fear, fatigue, and frustration are part of the healing process, not signs of failure.I’m not that old version of myself anymore, but I’m not less than I used to be. I’m still whole, and still capable of surfacing joy right where I am. This new version of me is shaped by resilience, self-awareness, and persistence. Every moment spent wishing for the past is a moment stolen from today.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Don’t Let the Past Steal From Today: I’m Not Less Than I Used To Be

I decided to major in math in college because I wanted to work at NASA. Needless to say, that big decision didn’t land me there. The small choices I make throughout the day ultimately shape who I become, not the big one we think define us. I spent a lot of years using my free will irresponsibly. Have you ever said, “I had no choice”? That usually means you reacted out of habit, fear, or impulse. Responsible free will lives in the pause between reaction and response where I can choose differently, even when it doesn’t feel like I can—pausing instead of reacting, listening instead of interrupting, choosing connection over isolation. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Responsible Free Will: I Had No Choice

This morning I was thinking about the relationship between  humility, open-mindedness, and soundness of mind (the definition of sanity.) We learn through our youth to become self-sufficient, but in doing so we often lose opportunities for connection. Getting humble just enough to know I don't have all the answers opens my mind to others and relieves the pressure I put on myself.Have you ever worked with that person who refuses to say, “I don’t know”? Instead, they always have an answer delivered with enough confidence to land a convincing weather forecast. When I learned how to say I don’t know, my mind opened and I became willing to learn from others. I mean, how can we learn anything from one another when we think we know everything already. There’s a constant battle between my ears to solve every problem, even those that don’t exist yet. There’s no peace in that sustained mental state. What if soundness of mind can be achieved simply through positioning myself to be curious?Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast

Soundness of Mind: Humble Curiosity

In this episode, I share how a message from church and a conversation in my AA meeting landed on the exact same theme: patience. I talk about what it means to trust the process before you fully understand it, especially when life feels like it’s taken a turn you didn’t choose. I reflect on my own stroke recovery and how what once felt like a dead end may actually be a repositioning that I couldn’t see at the time. If you’ve ever wondered why things aren’t happening faster or why your path feels unclear, this is a reminder that not everything meaningful grows quickly, and that faith often asks us to trust first and understand later.I also talk what patience feels like in real life. It’s not always calm and peaceful on the inside, it’s often messy, uncomfortable, and requires practice. Through tools like pausing, letting go of control, and using my “God box,” I’ve learned that patience is how I respond. Whether it’s resisting the urge to control people, slowing down, or simply not interrupting others, these moments build patience. If you’re feeling restless, stuck, or want things to hurry up, this episode will meet you right there and remind you: you’re not alone, and something stable and meaningful is  growing.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Patience: Trusting What You Can’t Yet See

Am I changing my goals to match my behavior, or changing my behavior to meet my goals? What about when we add chronic pain into the formula? Through the lens of stroke recovery, I struggle with fatigue, pain, and my desire to grow. I have a hard time telling the difference between honoring my limits and feeling like I’m lazy. If you’ve ever thought, “am I being lazy or am I truly exhausted,” you’re not alone. This is a daily internal negotiation so many of us face in recovery.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Realignment: Behavior vs. Goals

Serenity is directly tied to how I relate to my life as it is, and not as I try to make it. When my expectations don’t match reality, that gap creates frustration and anxiety. For me, serenity comes from accepting what is, even when it’s not how I want it. I don’t lower my expectations for my life, but I do adjust them to consider my chronic pain and disability. Through sobriety, I’ve learned that expectations can be thought of as premeditated disappointments. Acceptance, on the other hand, helps me to say, “Okay, this is happening today… now what?” That shift allows me to respond instead of resist. I define serenity as a moment when nothing is wrong—not because everything is perfect, but because I’ve stopped arguing with myself.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Serenity: Directly Proportional to Expectations and Acceptance

Carl Jung, Swiss psychologist, viewed loneliness as being misunderstood. In stroke recovery, I’ve experienced a loneliness that feels like not being fully seen, even when surrounded by people. When others can’t quite hear the effort it takes for me to think through a sentence or find the right words, it creates a subtle disconnection.We all know that connection is dependent on communication, but I’d not fully considered that loneliness results from others not understanding what we are trying to communicate or can’t say at all. Whether it’s sobriety, chronic illness, or any invisible illness, we heal when we find people like us who truly get it. Seek relationships where you can be honest about your challenges and don’t have to edit your authenicity. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Loneliness: When Invisible Illnesses Are Misunderstood

I have intense internal pressure to do things even when I know it will cost me physically. Inspired by a conversation with my psychiatrist, I used an emotion color wheel to slow down and name what’s underneath that pressure. The emotions, like fear, guilt, sadness, anxiety, and even grief over who I used to be, play a huge role in my daily decisions. It helps to identify those emotions and separate what I feel from reality.The worst thing that can happen is nothing. The things that matter the most to me, no one else can see. There are no disasters or collapse of society when Rachel crawls into bed to rest. I need to listen to my body instead of the urgency and pressure in my mind. I’m still learning the honest way to live within my limits, care for myself without guilt, and realize that protecting my wellness is the part that no one else can see but me.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Internal Pressure: The Worst Thing That Can Happen Is Nothing

The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins is our Q2 Reads and Recovery book pick. It captures the chaos and distortion of alcoholism so well!Saying No is a difficult but necessary part of self-care. You know those moments when everything in you is saying no, but we say yes anyway and then pay for it later with fatigue, pain, frustration, or resentment.Today I talk through what people pleasing really is. When I stopped to think about what I feel when I’m saying yes but want to say No, there is an underlying fear of conflict, disappointing others, and trying to manage how other people feel about me. For those of us living in recovery with a chronic illness or pain with limited energy, people pleasing becomes self-abandonment. Fighting that urge to respond right away and pausing first helps me listen to myself and practice simple, honest boundaries without over-explaining my Why. I help to redefine what saying No means so that we no longer feel selfish. Saying No for the right reasons is respecting our own wellness and protecting our recovery.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

People Pleasing: The Guide to Saying No

Advice is easier said than done. Things like “listen to your body,” “be patient with yourself,” and “accept where you are” are simple, but living them is something else entirely. In recovery, I navigate chronic pain, fatigue, and the constant negotiation between what I want to do and what my body will allow. And it’s all day long every day that the battle occurs.I’m writing a book—I don’t know if I’ve mentioned that. Well, it has proved to push me over my pain threshold, and now I have to pull back from devices entirely other than my podcast. My loving husband and I are working on a solution that will allow me to dictate the book, so I can still work on it every day but not have to sleep for hours every afternoon to recover.So, I do listen to my body, but only when it’s screaming so loud at me that I can’t ignore it anymore. I’ll keep practicing. 😉Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Easier Said Than Done: The Hard Part of Healing

I remember walking past some bushes in detox on the way to the cafeteria, scared a bottle of wine could be hiding there, waiting for me. What scared me was me. I didn’t trust that I could stop myself. I thought my recovery was just physical, and I just needed to control my hand from picking up a drink. But in that short walk, I saw that the problem was more about my mind reaching for the drink instead of my hand. My thoughts were just as out of control as my drinking. I looped through fears, obsession, and imagined scenarios that hadn’t even happened. I spent so much energy trying to control the world outside of me, but the work was learning how to live with a reality that I didn’t choose.That realization followed me into stroke recovery. I can’t control that my brain broke, as much as I can’t control where alcohol shows up in the world. I can, however control my response: how I show up, speak to myself, and pause vs react. Recovery starts with surrendering the control that I never actually had in the first place, and accepting who I am in this moment. Somewhere between surrender and acceptance, I begin to find peace, by focusing only on what’s within the limit of my fingertips and not beyond.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery  #stroke  #vestibularrecovery  #recovery  #vestibular  #disability  #soberlife  #recoverypodcast 

Within The Limit of My Fingertips: Surrender and Acceptance In Recovery

Living life on life’s terms in stroke recovery means learning how to live peacefully in a reality I didn’t choose. I still get angry, scared, frustrated, and sad, but I allow those feelings to run their course without dictating my behavior. Since my stroke I abandoned the illusion that I can control my life by just working harder, planning better, and pushing my body further. Neither life nor my body cooperate with that personal expectation. I can’t control when I hurt, feel dizzy, or struggle to talk. But I can control is how I respond and whether my peace grows or diminishes. Emotional recovery from stroke requires me to pause in my discomfort, acknowledge I don’t feel good, accept instead of resist, and to practice gratitude even when life feels unfair. Pain is not optional for me, but misery is. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery #stroke #vestibularrecovery #recovery #vestibular #disability #soberlife #recoverypodcast 

Life On Life’s Terms: Misery Is Optional

If I could talk to my past self, I would tell her she’s doing the best she can with the tools she has, and she’s not weak, broken, or uniquely over emotional. I would tell her that the anxiety and depression are real, not imagined, and that she doesn’t have to act like she’s ok and as if nothing is wrong. I would tell her that she simply has a human condition. She’s not the only one who feels dark, scared, overwhelmed, or different, and she doesn’t have to hide those feelings or punish herself for having them.I would tell her that happiness doesn’t just happen to lucky people. We have to participate in it, practice it, and move toward it through small daily choices. I would tell her that trying to control that which is outside of her fingertips will not save her, but acceptance, rest, and connection with others will. And even though life will not unfold the way she expects due to alcoholism, stroke, and unimaginable loss, she will be okay. I will tell her that she will grow into someone braver that she ever imagined being, wiser because of the hard stuff, and strong enough to help other people who feel the same way she does.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery #stroke #vestibularrecovery #recovery #vestibular #disability #soberlife #recoverypodcast 

What I’d Say to My Past Self: You’ll Be OK

I didn’t understand, or even want to consider the possibility that my stroke permanently changed my life in an instant. How do you wrap your head around that. I did everything right. I was sober for five years. I did yoga every day at 4 PM. And I even became a runner, albeit short distance and not fast. Maybe I should say casual jogger 😂. Anyway, I thought if I followed the rules, went to the doctors, did the therapy, and pushed hard through recovery, I would get to the end of it and back to normal. Instead, I spent two years trying to force myself into a life my brain could no longer sustain. I slowly increased my work load, ignoring my pain and measuring myself against the person I was before my stroke. I was in denial and terrified to admit that I could no longer do my job the way I used to. My career was slipping away from me. I  reached the point of unmanageability. I shut my computer, sat on my porch, and sobbed. Leaving my job was devastating, but it was also the beginning of accepting who I am now instead of chasing who I used to be. My stroke took away a great deal, but it did not take away my ability to create meaning, connect with others, write, speak, and help people. Looking back, the real struggle was trusting that a different life could still be beautiful and falling back in to the arms of the unknown.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#strokerecovery #stroke #vestibularrecovery #recovery #vestibular #disability #recoverypodcast 

Changed in an Instant: Leaving My Job Post-Stroke

I work hard to be happy. It takes intentional daily choices for me. Living with invisible illness, whether it was alcoholism, anxiety, depression, or now my vestibular disability after stroke, means there is so much going on inside of me that no one else can see. There’s a mental, emotional, and physical load behind even simple things I do. So I must participate in happiness and not wait for it to happen to me. I make conscious choices to do the things that bring me joy, comfort, meaning, and connection, even when I don’t feel like it.Happiness is getting dressed because I know I feel better when I get dooded up for the day. It is writing my book, recording my podcast, going to support groups, picking up the phone, making art, and practicing gratitude. It’s also knowing when to rest, when to say “not today,” and when to protect my energy. I can still feel grief, frustration, exhaustion, and fear, and choose to move in the direction of happiness anyway. That is the work.Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779 Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling#vestibular #strokerecovery #stroke #vestibularrecovery #recovery #recoverypodcast 

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